Face the Feelings

I’ve been on the Innergetics journey almost seven months now.  During these months, I have done a lot of work, peeling off the layers, exposing everything that is not physical hunger!  There has been so much to work through!

Each time I go to put food in my mouth and I realise “I’m not actually hungry”, I go through a process of working out  — what am I —

  • avoiding
  • stuffing down
  • drowning my sorrows
  • storing away to deal with later

And then there is the eating because of boredom, stress or overwhelm.  There are the times I am worried and simply prefer to eat than to face the situation.

How often have I, in the past:

  1. eaten on the run?
  2. fit in eating between appointments, wolfing down the food at my desk before I get going again?
  3. taken care of everyone else, and then sat down to a cold & tasteless meal?
  4. eaten mindlessly – working at the computer or in front of the TV?

All of these ways… setting myself up for failure!

“I can’t do this” – because I’m never quite present when I am eating.

And because I am never “quite present” when eating, I end up missing all the cues that my bodies provides “you can stop now, I’ve had enough“.  And inevitably I would end up  yucky, crowded, stuffed, tired, uncomfortable and with a foggy brain!

On the other hand, when I have taken time to pause… when I have stopped to truly enjoy the momentous occasion of eating… then I have totally enjoyed:

— taste
— smell
— texture
— variety

The feeling, the setting, the company I am with… and the simple pleasure of relaxing afterwards!

It then becomes easier to stop comparing myself to other women – my body to other bodies.  I stop competing against another person – or worse yet against another version of myself that was younger, and therefore, somehow “more perfect”.  When I take a moment to pause, there is less room for body-shaming and judging myself harshly – there is more room to be compassionate with myself!

Because… at the end of the day – who is judging me?  If I live with rules – you can have this, you can’t eat that – at some moment there is guilt.  “You broke the rules“… and consequently… there must be punishment!  But — who am I punishing?

Dare to change the story!

What are the stories that I tell myself about food? about eating? about myself? about my body?

What are the stories that I am telling myself about my life?

Through these months, as I have been coached through dealing with everything that is not eating – eating has actually become easy! Finally, there are moments when I can enjoy eating and savour each mouthful.

Then I am able to celebrate “total choice” – to eat whatever I want! Understanding and acknowledging that I am physically hungry!

But to reach that place – first you have to deal with the root of the problem.  The real question and struggle is identifying:

What do I really need & want?

Face the Felings, feeling, coaching, deal, check in, intuitive, eating, empathy, compassion, mindfulness, avoid, avoiding, drowning, boredom, stress, worry, overwhelm, guilt, rules, punishment, connected, disconnected
Ditch the diet… face the feelings!

How am I feeling – right here? right now?  When I am completely present within myself and my body – what are the thoughts and patterns that I am noticing?

During this time, I have used mindfulness to carry out body check ins.  What are the sensations and thoughts that I have when I take my awareness to my:

  • mouth
  • tongue
  • throat
  • esophagus
  • solar plexus
  • stomach
  • small & large intestine
  • liver, kidneys & gall bladder

What do I really feel when I am totally connected with my gut?

Mindfulness, at that time, also focuses on the questions of:

  1. Where am I eating?
  2. Am I stopping to eat – or do I not have time for myself?
  3. Will I continue “doing” while I eat – not truly doing and not truly eating?

When I honour my body & honour my hunger – I stop! I listen to my body – what does it need right now?

It’s through these moments that I am able to shift my focus to intuitive eating – practicing wholeness & health – mentally, physically and spiritually!  The message that I am giving myself when I find time to stop is

“You are important”.

 

What would it take for you to embark on this journey?

 

Advertisements

2 comments

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s